Jokes



  • dumb ass blonde
    a blonde was traveling along a higway and gets to an intersection not thinking she goes straight through, as she goes through she collides with a $100,000 bmw. she stps the car and gets out. Her car was perfect not even a scratch. the man gets out of the bmw and walks up to her and draws a circle on the ground. He tells her to not get out, so she stands in the circle. the man walks over to his car and gets out a baseball bat. He starts smashing the car. She starts laughing but he keeps on going, After 10 mins the car is all smashed up and the blonde is laughing on the ground he walks over to her and asks why she is laughing, she replies"every time u turned around i steped outside the circle"

    Sex in the Dark
    There was this couple that had been married for 20 years. Every time they made love the husband always insisted on shutting off the light. Well, after 20 years the wife felt this was ridiculous. She figures she would break him out of this crazy habit. So one night, while they were in the middle of a wild, screaming, romantic session, she turned on the lights.
    She looked down and saw her husband was holding a battery-operated leisure device… A vibrator! Soft, wonderful and larger than a real one. She went completely ballistic. “You impotent bastard,” She screamed at him, "How could you be lying to me all of these years? You better explain yourself!"
    The husband looks her straight in the eyes and says calmly: “I’ll explain the toy . . . You explain the kids.”




 

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